By DemocracyRules
This is an all-purpose news report about Obama. There is no need to dwell on details of the latest revelations; this article is a one-size-fits-all replacement:
“Reporting from WASHINGTON/ CHICAGO/ BACK OF OBAMA’S LIMO/ ON FLIGHT WITH CNN WOMEN, (Disassociating Press):
Yesterday/today/tomorrow/ Obama did/said something surprising regarding Islam/ Christianity/ Rev Wright/ Rezko/ the Weather Underground/ the Black Panthers/ Winnie the Pooh/ political cronies/ the US Government/ energy policy/ Big Oil/ his grandmother/ Odinga/ Israel/ Iran/ Iraq/ his wife/ Nuclear Weapons/ 20th Century History/ NAFTA/ Canada/ Columbia/ Venezuela/ hiding Muslim women with Hijabs/ Iranian financial backers/ Mandingo.
This current action/ statement appears incongruous regarding Obama’s previous actions/ statements he has made in the past on the same issue. In fact it seems to represent a complete reversal of policy on his part.
In a statement yesterday/ today/ tomorrow/ Obama said that he had been misrepresented in the past/ present/ future regarding this issue. He was shocked and dismayed to discover the new information. “This is not the Islam/ Christianity/ Rev Wright/ Rezko/ the Weather Underground/ the
Black Panthers/ Winnie the Pooh/ political cronies/ the US Government/
energy policy/ Big Oil/ his grandmother/ Odinga/ Israel/ Iran/ Iraq/
his wife/ Nuclear Weapons/ 20th Century History/ NAFTA/ Canada/
Columbia/ Venezuela/ hiding Muslim women with Hijabs/ Iranian financial
backers/ Mandingo, that I knew” he declared.
He indirectly accused his accusers of racism for bringing up the issue. He made veiled allusions to “a vast right-wing conspiracy”, and said the middle of a political campaign was no time to discuss the issues. He denied that he had ever thought/ said/ did anything negative/ positive regarding Islam/ Christianity/ Rev Wright/ Rezko/ the Weather Underground/ the Black Panthers/ Winnie the Pooh/ political cronies/ the US Government/ energy policy/ Big Oil/ his grandmother/ Odinga/ Israel/ Iran/ Iraq/ his wife/ Nuclear Weapons/ 20th Century History/ NAFTA/ Canada/ Columbia/ Venezuela/ hiding Muslim women with Hijabs/ Iranian financial backers/ Mandingo.
In a later statement his campaign spokesperson Huma Abedin/ Soledad O’Brian/ Ahmadinejad/ Hillary Clinton/ Jimmy Carter said these critical statements were deliberate efforts to embarrass candidate Obama, and from now on certain topics will be off-limits in the campaign.
These off-limits topics include Islam/ Christianity/ Rev Wright/ Rezko/ the Weather Underground/ the Black Panthers/ Winnie the Pooh/ political cronies/ the US Government/ energy policy/ Big Oil/ his grandmother/ Odinga/ Israel/ Iran/ Iraq/ his wife/ Nuclear Weapons/ 20th Century History/ NAFTA/ Canada/ Columbia/ Venezuela/ hiding Muslim women with Hijabs/ Iranian financial backers/ and Mandingo.
In a later statement, Obama said “I want to warn those who can smear me faster than I can smear them, that I will not sit idle. If they bring a knife/ gun/ tank/ nuclear weapon/ bottle of black shoe polish/ hammer and sickle to the fight, I will bring a bigger knife/ gun/ tank/ nuclear weapon/ bottle of black shoe polish/ hammer and sickle to the fight.”
So there you have it. One size fits all.
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