By DemocracyRules
Also see:
What do Women Want?
What Do Men Want?
Promiscuity in Women
Why Are Good Men So Hard to Find?
Women recently did this poll
Women are not that hard to find, they’re all over the place. Even if you only consider the attractive ones there are a lot of them. There are a lot of single ones, too. About 20% of adult women are single.
Of course the problem is that most women don’t want you. You’re wrong somehow. You will remain single unless you work hard at it. Furthermore, unless you’re really rich and attractive she will dump you if she’s unhappy. Why? Well, women TOLD US WHY in my other posts. This is what almost all women are looking for:
(1) Physical Attractiveness
(2) Good Income
(3) Fatherly behavior
(4) Unequivocal and persisting love
(5) Intelligence
(6) Sexual capability
Picture: She wants love too
This list has been around forever. Just DO THE LIST and you will find and keep women. Some men want to be accepted as they are. Well buddy, some of us want a FREE HOUSE too. Most men who say such things are single, and that’s good, because otherwise they would probably just make women suffer. This is not a girl-guy thing. Gay couples also try to change each other.
Men, it’s this simple, if you’re single you must change yourself or you will be alone. If you are unhappily married, you must change yourself or you will remain unhappily married. If you have split up, you must change yourself or you will not find a good woman. When you’re in trouble in life, ALWAYS think about changing yourself first. It is much easier.
Why are there so few men out there who meet these simple requirements? Because men don’t get it. As I said before, women’s list is probably genetic for them. They are designed to perpetuate their genes, and they use the K-strategy (elephants) to do this.
Since cave days, women needed a man who looked attractive (healthy) and who could support the woman and her babies well enough so they would live until adulthood. The man couldn’t beat up the woman or the kids, because that’s dangerous. The man had to love the woman, or he wouldn’t stick around and fix up the cave. If he’s intelligent, he will pass some intelligence to the kids, and he also has a better chance of keeping everyone fed. Sexually he has to actually be able to make babies. Beyond that she’s not too picky about sexual perfection.
Since love was invented, men have complained that this list is TOO LONG. Besides, women add a whole bunch of other things behind your back. They also reject men who have problems with personal hygiene, promiscuity, bisexuality alcoholism, gambling disorders, rage disorders, hidden psychoses, criminal involvement, a passionate love for monster trucks, an unremitting death wish, etc, etc.
They’re not even sure about men who sleep with their socks on or can't make the bed.
But the women’s list is really about trying to find a man who will be a good father and husband. You have to be clean to prevent disease in the family. Promiscuity, bisexuality alcoholism, gambling disorders, rage disorders, hidden psychoses, and criminal involvement all endanger the integrity of the family. Of course women don’t like it. If you do that stuff you’re a lousy baby machine. Furthermore, you will just be hard to live with, and very often more work than it’s worth.
Men Have a Much Shorter List
Once we’ve found a woman who interests us, we seem to need only three main things to stay with her. She must look pretty, be nice, and get physical reasonably often. Looking pretty is fairly straightforward, because when you first saw her, you decided you liked her looks well enough to get to know her. What men want is for her to try to keep looking as good as she can. Even as she ages, if she takes care of herself, she will still look good enough. I don’t like it when a woman let’s herself go because it’s a sign that she doesn’t care about me.
Niceness is harder, because most women can be placed somewhere on this bell curve:
Half the women will be below the average, half above it. Women can sense that men want them to be nice, so when we first meet them they usually try to be nice. If they keep doing it, the relationship continues. The biggest problem is when the woman starts to slide backwards. For sure, she will tell you that she’s sliding because you are not doing “The List” with your full effort.
This is difficult because sometimes she’s right and sometimes she’s wrong. Sometimes she never was a very nice person, and she is just sliding back to her usual state on the niceness scale. When she does this, she will blame you, but it may not be valid. No wonder men are so confused. I know, it’s hard to continue being prince charming when she’s calling you a dweeb. As a lesbian friend of mine says, “Women!”
If you think women are confusing, how about men? As boys become teenagers, most of us adopt the reproductive strategy of oysters (the r-strategy). Oysters just spew out eggs and/or sperm into the sea, and if a pair meets up it starts growing into an oyster. Women can’t be oysters because they normally have fewer than 10 children. That’s a tiny number compared to oysters. This is a key reason why teenage boys are so confused about girls, because their reproductive strategies are so different. Eventually, as young men we start to realize the oyster strategy doesn’t seem to work, because most nights we sleep alone.
So, reluctantly we become more elephant-like (the K-strategy). We become more loyal to one woman, start to build a long-term relationship, and think about a family. We fix up the cave. But women know that we never completely abandon oysterhood, and of course our oysterhood is their enemy because they want along term loving stable relationship, which has no oystering in it at all. So modern marriage immediately asks men to be something that is unnatural for them. No wonder it’s hard.
However, older guys will often tell you that oystering is no good for men anyway, because in fact men need and want love. Love is not part of an oyster’s life, but men need love. So the trade-off is actually beneficial for us. Older guys usually like being grandparents, and they’re happier than ever.
So how do you make a woman happy? Well first find someone who has a long history of being a nice person. Find out a bit about her past and watch her when she’s tired or stressed out. It’s a good sign of she describes past relationships as learning experiences or situations where she could not adapt herself to the circumstances. The best predictor of the immediate future is the immediate past.
Your Job is to Be the Sheraton Hotel
Most of us know a bit about expense-account hotels, with their spiffy lobbies, easy access to conveniences, and friendly, helpful staff. Hotels do these things because market research and practical experience has taught them about what their customers want. They ignore fringe markets and go for the mainstream.
So men, treat women as if you’re the Sheraton. Don’t be weird, be mainstream. Be as spiffy as you reasonably can be. No green socks and birkenstocks. Dress conventionally and dress well. Make things match, throw out junk clothing, keep clean. Present well. Get your hair cut, use deodorant, shave properly and wear sweaters with no soup spots on them. Have a decent car and keep it clean inside and out. Be friendly, warm, and accommodating. Speak proper English. Shine her shoes for free, bring her the paper and coffee in the morning, and make sure she’s comfortable. Don’t upset her or make her angry if you can possibly avoid it.
Keep your apartment or house clean and presentable, and if you can’t do this yourself, hire a cleaner. Provide free parking. Cook for her as well as you can. Make her coffee, toast, eggs, whatever you can do. I have a friend who has never been alone because he cooks for women. Discuss ordinary topics that will interest her. Mostly just ask her questions and let her talk. It’s better that way. You already know a lot about yourself, you want to get to know about her. If in doubt ask, “what are you thinking?” She will be surprised and pleased, and she will tell you interesting things.
Do this, and she will love you. You are fulfilling everything on her list just by being the Sheraton. If in doubt, ask yourself what the Sheraton would do. Do these things even if she has purple hair and a dog collar. The Sheraton is the best place to start, and if she shifts the topic to leather underwear, then go with that, but mostly just ask her about her opinions. Don’t push weird topics. Always be friendly, warm and accommodating. In her heart of hearts, she dreams of prince charming with purple hair and a dog collar. Later you can probably negotiate down to hair gel and a colored shirt.
If you examine the poll results, notice that women mainly want a nice guy who loves them. If you keep doing this forever you will keep her forever.
Happy Hunting
Pro Patria
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